Project Renewment The First Retirement Model for Career Women

1 RETIREMENT: YES OR NO you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there. -- Lewis Carroll "It was easier to make the decision to divorce my husband than it was to make the decision to retire. I actually thought replacing my husband would be easier than replacing my career," said a sixty-seven-year-old interior designer. A sixty-six-year-old executive director found that retirement was the hardest decision she ever made. "Work was my life. The people I worked with were my family. Facing my staff and board members to say good-bye was wrenching. I couldn't sleep at night and felt sick. I was saying good-bye to what I had created, to the people who surrounded me and to the biggest part of my life." Effective women are decisive. We make decisions about policies, products, programs and practices. We negotiate deals, reorganize departments, make hiring and firing decisions and do what it takes to create thoughtful change. Yet, when we are faced with our own decision to retire, many of us wrestle, waffle and even suffer. Women in Project Renewment shared their views in this back and forth "should I or should I not" retirement conversation they had with themselves. Here are some of their comments that reflect the allure of retirement: "Retirement means less stress and deadlines." "The alarm clock would be set on 'off' and time would finally belong to me." "Commuting would stop, which means a lot in Los Angeles." "Having the freedom to do what I want to do, when I want to do it." "I will be able to eat better, exercise more and spend more time outdoors." "It's wonderful to know that I will have more of a 'life' to spend with family and friends." At the same time, they were aware of the downside: "Not working would create a huge void in my life. What would I say when someone asks me 'what do you do?'" "I am afraid of cutting ties with my work, the people, culture and structure." "I would miss the challenge and stimulation." Personal stories reveal the ambivalence -- the pull from and push toward retirement. "It has taken me years to finally make the decision. I thought about all of the reasons to leave my work, but just couldn't do it. I had nothing to go to." A project manager joined the group at age fifty-nine, eighteen months before she planned to retire. Her company had moved, leaving her with a two-hour commute. "I always assumed that I would work until I was sixty-five, but the long commute is leaving me exhausted. When my family comes over, I can't wait for them to leave. When I am out with friends for a social evening, I can't wait to get home. When my husband talks to me at the end of the day, I have to pretend to listen. I feel as if life is passing me by while I am half asleep. Maybe it's time to retire, but I really don't want to give up my work." A sixty-seven-year-old woman has been working as an agency director of a nonprofit organization for the past twenty years. "I can never retire. My husband and I never made a financial plan for our future; we also made some unwise investments. It wasn't until I had been at my agency for ten years that the board finally okayed a retirement plan, so I have very little money in my retirement fund. I am sick of managing people and dealing with board members and donors. We do need the money, and I still am working." A seventy-year-old psychotherapist doesn't know if or when she will retire. "I love my private practice and supervising interns. My husband's health is not good and I need to spend more time with him, although not full-time. I am considering cutting back my hours or eliminating the supervision of interns, but I keep putting it off. If I didn't work, I don't know what I would do with myself. I am not the type of person who is part of the lunch crowd and I really don't have any hobbies. My work is my joy." Ambivalence is diminished when the retirement decision is determined by internal and external conditions and eveBratter, Bernice is the author of 'Project Renewment The First Retirement Model for Career Women', published 2008 under ISBN 9780743299480 and ISBN 0743299485.