Magic Words Work Powerful Phrases to Help You Conquer the Working World

Achilles Was Lucky We've both known Sara for almost twenty years. Her creative ability and her strength as a manager have landed her a job as editor in chief of a top women's magazine, but back in the days when she was just starting out, Sara was a features editor at a small magazine. That's how Alexandra, who was working as a freelance writer, met her. She got a call from Sara, inviting her to lunch. "I've got an assignment for you," Sara told her. "It's a little different from what you usually write." "You've got my attention." "Do you remember the Iliad?" "I read it in college. I loved it." "Do you recall Achilles' one weakness?" "What is this? A quiz show?" "Go along with me on this." "Okay, teacher. It was his heel." "You get an A. Now, Alexandra, do you think most people have a weakness? No, let's call it a flaw." "That's easy. Of course they do." "What would you say yours is?" "That's easy, too. I'm terrible about returning phone calls. Except when it's to an editor, of course." Sara looked approving, as though Alexandra had earned herself another A. "You've just proved my theory, and I think it will make a great piece. Here's my idea. I've always believed that everyone has more than one flaw. We usually pick one that's fairly mild, acknowledge it, and ignore the others. Lucky Achilles. Can you imagine how nice it would be to have only one weakness? Take me, for example. Except for work, I'm always late. I know it. I admit it to friends, and I actually try to work on it. I've improved a bit, but in the meantime my husband has pointed out that, while I'm owning up to that flaw, I have another one which is actually worse. I have a terrible temper, and I lose it over small things. I mean, really tiny things. I pat myself on the back because I've been on time and then blow up because someone else has beaten me to a parking space. So, as my husband puts it, I have a sweet little flaw that I acknowledge, and a big bad flaw that I don't. How about it, Alexandra? Are you willing to interview people and get them to tell you the sweet little flaw and then prod them into pulling out the big bad one?" Alexandra was, and it produced a great article. One chef initially confessed to an unwillingness to share his Chinese food when eating out with friends, and then, asked to try again, admitted that he really hated having women in his kitchen. There was the woman copywriter who coyly revealed an aversion to sharing taxicabs and then, pressed, admitted that she was so tightfisted that she recycled gifts she didn't want and gave them to her staff at Christmas. So what is the point of these Magic Words? They're a reminder that if we're like most people we've chosen to acknowledge a fairly harmless flaw and may be letting something far more serious get in the way of our success. Unlike Achilles, who knew the danger of his heel, we aren't always aware of the flaws that can do us harm. The chef who hated female kitchen staff had to acknowledge it to deal with it--certainly every woman who'd ever applied to him for a job had picked up on what he felt. And the copywriter's tightfisted giving was a common source of complaint in her office. Alexandra's long-ago article taught her that it pays to move past the innocent quirk--in herself and others--and look for the flaw that really causes problems. Chew, Chew, Chew "Chew your food," our mothers used to say. And even though they didn't insist that we chew each mouthful a hundred times before swallowing, they made it clear that gulping things down was not only bad manners, it was also bad for the digestion. "Momilies," as author Michele Slung has labeled those homilies handed downKaminsky, Howard is the author of 'Magic Words Work Powerful Phrases to Help You Conquer the Working World', published 2004 under ISBN 9780767914413 and ISBN 0767914414.